Khushi conjures up the thought that perhaps we revert to the 70s and 80s to the classic Hrishikesh Mukherjee or Basu Chatterjee films, small films with simple themes, good scripts and nicely acted. In fact, my first thought was that this was going to be something like Mukhrejee’s “Khoobsurat”, about a girl who brings khushi to all and sundry. It could have gone the pother way as well...being a “Mili”, beaming joy all around but losing your own battle with life. Well, set aside any such joys that you may anticipate because Khushi is simply a very bad film. Better still, please substitute Dukhi for Khushi!

The narrative informs us of the birth of two children, Khushi (Kareena) born in Chamoli and Karan (Fardeen) born in Calcutta. The narrator tells us that fate is to bring them together which it does one year later whilst in a sari shop, both babies touch hands whilst their parents, oblivious to their children, buy what they have to and leave without a glance at the other child. But as Yash Chopra said in Dil to Pagal Hai, someone somewhere is made for you and we now have to wait to see how these two eventually land up together.

Our first encounter with Khushi is in hot pants and tight tops, dancing with the villagers on her way home to her father and mother. Father is keen to get her married and she is keen to study more. However, knowing full well that she is going to thwart her father’s plans somehow, she agrees to marry only to find that the boy scarpers, leaving her up the creek without a paddle. Now this is all most intriguing because this fits perfectly with her plans but somehow, we are later expected to believe that this has had a profound effect on our lissom lass. Now we are introduced to Karan, bouncing around to “Good morning India and I love my India” except that he appears so far from it, somewhere in the American continent that when he finally steps forth on some street in India, you wonder what’s going on. Not that it really matters.

Both meet at College, became friends blowing hot and cold with arguments galore thrown in to jazz up the proceedings. Karan and Khushi obviously care for each other but neither is able to tell the other and what is left is a screaming match between the two which is neither funny nor emotionally affecting. It tickles no funny bone at all when Karan in a drunken state eats Khushi’s picture only to see Khushi standing there watching him. I cringed for the umpteenth time when I saw that and we were only half way through.

The major blow out comes when Karan ogles at Khushi’s belly button, staring as if he has never seen a belly button before, with beads of sweat around the blasted belly button, supposed to be exciting and sexy. This scene goes on endlessly and quite rightly, Khushi takes umbrage at our lothario’s salacious looks. Another argument ensues and the friendship breaks up.

But fate brings them together when the friend’s they were trying to get together encounter problems because of the girl’s Mafia father so both Karan and Khushi decide to help them without being friends themselves. Well we all know what’s going to happen in the end, its the journey of how they get there. And let me tell you, it seemed like a very very very long journey indeed.

Suryah has adapted a South film and where the story required finesse, he has gone in for loud and crass over the top comedy with absolutely no charm or sensitivity. There is not a moment in the film where one really feels affected by these two sparring parties. The stilted dialogues do nothing to make proceedings better. The director seems to be like a rudderless ship, with oceans ahead and not knowing where to go. The story itself could have been made with a great deal of charm and if infused with the simplicity of something like saathiya, would most definitely have worked.

Kareena Kapoor is simply awful..I am sorry to say, yet again. But then, she has interpreted the role the way the director has asked her to and all she does is scream, make faces at the camera and an ass of herself. Fardeen Khan is also hugely disappointing although probably marginally better than Kareena. They vibe well together and its a colossal waste of money and effort to make this rubbish when the potential was there for much more.

It makes no sense to me to spend 2 crore on tere bina tere bina’s picturisation, which at best is a bore. We have seen better songs shot better and who’s interested in all this stuff now? MTV songs don’t attract audiences and you’ve seen it on TV so why bother going to the film? Put that money into making a better film! Anu Malik’s music actually turns out to be a decent score....the title song, hai re hai re, jiya mere jiya and the deleted aaja piya making an impression.

Kareena sings...aaye re aye re khushi, layee re layee re khushi. Well, let me tell you that she is most certainly in breach of her promise there as this film is probably one of the most obvious examples of title of film having NOTHING to do with the film.